John and I have never been shy about how much we love each other. Since we knew we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together, it has never been a secret…especially not to each other. We are not the over the top couple who cannot keep their hands off each other in public, but we do steal kisses, hold hands, and constantly take a moment to touch no matter where we were. I would have my arm under his or run my hand on his back and rub his bald head…he would always have his hand on my leg driving around town or brush his hand on my arm…all this to say “I love you” without saying anything at all. The touch I will miss the most is his hand on my face. He would grab my cheeks to kiss me or when I cry he put one hand on the side of my face to comfort me. His rough, large, shaky hands on my face would always make the world go away and make everything well again…if only for that minute. Now, as we sit here and cry several times a day, I grab his hand and put it on the side of my cheek for him. Weaker and sobbing himself, his still shaking hands on my face are now thinner but still full of so much love. To help him with my touch, there are constant foot rubs, back rubs, embraces, head rubs…anything and everything to keep my energy on him. Just saying I love you is not enough…showing him and comforting him with my love is just as significant. We usually fall asleep holding hands…again, all trying to fill him full of my energy. The power of a person’s touch is an amazing thing…many do not realize how much sweet energy they can give someone just from a simple touch.
Something else very touching to our family is the outpouring of love from this blog. Getting random messages from those we have never met is extraordinary. Those who take the time to write encouraging words, love, prayers, mention us on their own blogs, become followers of our blog, and who just plain read about our story are all incredibly thoughtful. Thank you too. I always thank our family and friends and I must thank you as well. You know who you are…I do not know you either, but thank you for taking the time to read and follow. It means more than you know. Here is the beautiful man we are all fighting for…family, friends, and strangers alike.
We'll do it all
ReplyDeleteEverything
On our own
We don't need
Anything
Or anyone
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel
Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden
That's bursting into life
Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads
I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden
That's bursting into life
All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes
They're all I can see
I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things
Will never change for us at all
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol <3
Just heard it...and thought of you two.
Cat, I've been reading your blog for months, reading about you and John; I cannot tell you how each update moves me, inspires me, and tears me apart all at once. Your strength, John's...it's truly amazing and I'm humbled by it. Each time I read or think of you two, I send all the love, energy, and hope I have in me. I just wanted to leave a comment here and add on to the many prayers...
ReplyDeleteYou two are an inspiration and proof that true love is out there. Finding someone that you would give your all to, that you would fight day in and day out for, that you would be strong for because the other is weak. I pray for John's health and comfort, for the strength of your families, for your hearts to be lighter and the days be peaceful. I also thank God that he placed true love in both of you and allowed you to find it one another. You both are fighting the ultimate battle and I’m in awe of the courage you’ve shown us. The unconditional love that has been shown on both sides is indescribable. On a selfish note, I also thank God that he allowed me to enter your lives. I know you more Cat and you are one of a kind. Your smile is infectious, your heart is bigger than most and I don’t think you’ve come across a stranger. These are just a few characteristics that I’m sure made John fall in love with you. I’m so thankful that he has you by his side to bring love and comfort to him. There isn’t a day that goes by when I don’t think of you both. Continuing to pray and sending love and positive energy from the bottom of my heart. Love you
ReplyDeleteWe love you and pray for you both everyday!
ReplyDeleteHolly and JB
Cat and John,
ReplyDeleteI would have to agree with previous comments. My heart, thoughts, and prayers go out to you both and your family. The two of you are not only a inspiration, but a blessing in how you have not only touched my life and those around you in your strength and positivity. God bless you both and lots of love sent your way.
Praying for comfort from the pain for John and for comfort for you having to watch the one you love in pain. Your life is touching us here in Winnipeg Canada and just want you to know that every ounce of my being wants the best for you. You seem like a really cool couple!
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Kimberly
Cat,
ReplyDeleteYou don't know me, but I am a friend of Lauren's. I have been reading your blogs & my heart breaks each time, but at the same time fills me with so much encouragement. I am amazed at your strength, at your love, at how beautiful you & Joh are together and how you take NOTHING for granted. It makes me realize how much I DO take for granted.
I will continue to pray for your strength and that your time with John continue to be filled with love and sweet things. I will continue to pray for comfort for John. You both are amazing and I feel God's hand over both of you. God Bless you & keep you both.
With much love,
Jessica Carter, Cincinnati, OH
Cancer is so limited...
ReplyDeleteIt cannot cripple love.
It cannot shatter hope.
It cannot corrode faith.
It cannot eat away peace.
It cannot destroy confidence.
It cannot kill friendship.
It cannot shut out memories.
It cannot silence courage.
It cannot reduce eternal life.
It cannot quench the Spirit.
I pray for you guys every day even thought we have never met. Your blog had touched me and literally changed my life! Thank you for that.
ReplyDeleteCat and John,
ReplyDeleteYou are in my prayers everyday. My eldest sister has inoperable brain cancer and I can relate to so much that you and your family are going through. I know there is nothing I can say that has not already been said but know that you are in my thoughts often. Your story has touched me and my family - know that you are being sent well wishes and love from Wisconsin.
Pure Inspiration.
ReplyDeleteThank YOU!
I have been reading your blog ssince Dallas ask for prayers....it is very inspiring..having lost 2 very close family members to cancer,I still can't imagine what you go through on an hourly basis...John inspires me to do more with my life...You inspire me to learn to be stronger.I will continue to pray pray pray for the both of you.
ReplyDeleteWe can all only assume that you question on a regular basis why in the world something like this is happening to such an amazing person, couple, and family. I know I do. One of the main reasons has got to be the amazing example you are both teaching to so many people. John, your commitment to Cat and to not giving up, and your spirit both past and present. Cat, your strength that seems to come from nowhere and be so strong and consistent all the time. But most importantly, as a couple. People give up so easily on each other sometimes. You show such perseverance, and without a flicker of hesitation. You truly make me appreciate that and every glance, small touch, and I love you. That will live on...
ReplyDeleteLove you so much kitten.
Although I have never met either of you, you have such a huge impression on my life. Thank you for being a portrait of true, unconditional love. Praying for you both.
ReplyDeleteCat and John - I have been following your blog for a long time now. I work with Justin and Alicia Lindgren and I wanted to say you two are my inspiration. I always look forward to reading your next blog and I would have to say that you are excellent writers. I cry at times and smile at times. Your love for each other shines through these blogs and I hope one day I will find it with someone as well. I have been saying prayers for the both of you. I believe that you take with you what you experience here on earth and we will all see each other again in the after life. Only our Heavenly Father knows why we experience these hard times in our lives. I feel one day we will know the answers. Keep the faith. Remember love conquers all. God Bless. Pam
ReplyDeleteI wish I could take your pain away. I wish that I could give John and you the long happy life that you planned together. It breaks my heart that your heart is breaking. I know we haven't been friends long, but you're incredible to me and I love you very much. Please give John my love. I wish I could give it to him myself. And tell him that everytime I see ear plugs, I think of him. :-)
ReplyDeleteI have been praying for you both throughout these months, and am in awe of the strength and pure love you have displayed throughout. God Bless you both.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you and John everyday. I have so much more to say but can't seem to get it out in a way that makes sense. Just know that you inspire me everyday and provide much needed perspective.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ag_OeL3z_P8
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